There's something strange, in my neighborhood...

Something very odd is happening to me.

I have a phantom in my house. Or a ghost. Or a homeless person. I don't know what yet.
All I know is I'm starting to get freaked the crap out.

Either that or I have suddenly developed schizophrenia.

It started off very subtle. I'd come home and think "hmm..I don't remember getting that glass out, but oh well, I know I forget things." Or, "How did that box get there?" I really did think that I was just moving things and in my rush, not realizing that I had done it.

Yesterday things changed. And today I'm writing a blog about it.

I found an Arby's bag on my counter.

I haven't had Arby's in a few weeks. But even THEN I thought "Okay...uh...maybe my parents got Arby's on Monday when they were here and I didn't notice it for 3 days....yeah that's it! I don't have some crazy person using my kitchen when I'm not here....with a key to my house....and a desire for the blood of a 25 year old female..."


Today it went too far.


I got home from work and saw a glass of sweet tea on my table. I had water last night, not sweet tea. Still hopeful, yet starting to get really paranoid, I thought "Maybe it's Paul's?" However, Paul hadn't been to my house in several days, and I don't leave glasses of tea on the table.

Then I saw the ramen pot in my sink and the bowl with the fork in it. I KNOW I haven't eaten any ramen, plus I emptied my sink out last night. This is starting to get a bit ridonkulous.

I am trying to do some sleuthing, and I have come up with the following list of suspects:

-Marley and Abby
WHY THEY ARE GUILTY: Very smart, lots of free time, unlimited access to the kitchen.
WHY THEY ARE INNOCENT: No thumbs.
VERDICT: Innocent (for now)

-Me
WHY I AM GUILTY: I like ramen, sweet tea, and Arby's. I also forget things a lot and have a tendency to be messy.
WHY I AM INNOCENT: I'm not crazy, plus I'm gone at work all day when this is happening. Also, I put dishes in the dishwasher, not the sink.
VERDICT: Innocent

-Paul
WHY HE IS GUILTY: He has a key, likes Arby's (not sure about the ramen though), and he is able to go wherever he wants for lunch.
WHY HE IS INNOCENT: He works in Charlotte, and he said he didn't do it.
VERDICT: Innocent

-Kayla
WHY SHE IS GUILTY: She has a key, likes ramen, likes Arby's, and is my roommate. Aha!
WHY SHE IS INNOCENT: She's at church camp right now.
VERDICT: Innocent, although momentarily promising!

That's it! Those are all the people who have a key and a motive. I am completely at a loss for what is happening to me.

So I'm blogging about it.

Dear Mr./Miss. Phantom or Homeless Person,

Why do you come to my house for lunch? Aren't my dogs intimidating? Marley could eat your face off, you know that right? Okay, he obviously hasn't yet so you must have a way to charm him. Will you please tell me who you are? It is scaring me. If you are going to keep coming to my house, will you please put your dishes and trash away properly? I know my dishwasher was full today, so I can excuse that--but just note that for future reference, I put dirty dishes in the dishwasher. Also, I am sorry my house is so messy. I didn't know to expect intruders...uh...visitors, I mean. Thank you for throwing away Kayla's Buffalo Wild Wings box. That was very nice of you. But still...its creepy.

Have a good day!

Love,
Kerri